1 post tagged “annoying wife”

Vintage Bed

Ruben is an 'early to bed, early to rise' kind of guy.  I am prone to spurts of silliness at the most inopportune times.

I was hanging out in the Man-Cave last night (as the Man of the Man-Cave had already gone to bed) watching a reality show where thugs can be transformed into gentleman, when I just got tired and crawled in next to Ruben.  Where it is summer and all, I have removed the comforter and we use a single sheet.  On nights where the thermometer still reads 110 after sundown, a sheet, if anything is all that you need.

Ruben was sound asleep until  I got in so I pulled a portion of the sheet over me.  This apparently was enough to wake him a little, and he turned over, taking half the sheet with him.  I said, "hey, now I'll be cold!"  If even.

He replies in a half groggy voice, "Here," and thrusts half of the sheet over me.  When he turns back over the sheet goes with him.

I thought this was a good of time as any to break into song.

"Oh NOBODY knoooooowwwwwwwwwws  the trouble I have SEEEEEEEEEN!  Nobody KNOWS the trouble I have SEE-"

"SHUT UP!" says my husband.

"Wait a minute.  Did you just tell me to shut up?"

"Yes!"

"Oh."  30 seconds pass.  "But honey?"  No answer.  "Honey?"

"What!" he yells.

"Did I mention that I love you?  And oh yeah, one other thing..............Oh NOBODY knows the trouble Ruben has seen!  Nobody KNOWS the trouble Ruben has SEEEEEN!"

I heard it before I felt it.  Whoosh!  A pillow came flying over to my side of the bed and landed on my shoulder.  -Not quite sure if that was the intended anatomy target that was suppose to get the point across.  I of course burst into peals of laughter.  Ruben turned himself over in an exaggerated manner and covered his head with his remaining pillow.

I think I have been banished to the sofa for life.